Fearing Fear

Faces of Fear, Pencils, 5.5 X 8.5

How much and how long must we hold on to fear?

What are we afraid of?

Why are we so afraid?

Afraid to dream big because we don't feel like we're worthy

Afraid to move forward because we're unsure where to begin

Afraid to admit our mistakes that we swear to bring our secrets to our grave

Afraid to take a risk because don't want to fail

Afraid to speak up because we're unsure if we can articulate what we want to say

Afraid to be vulnerable because we don't want to feel judged

Afraid of giving up what no longer serves us because we have become co-dependent.

Afraid to open a can of worms because we're unsure what to do next

Afraid of displeasing people that we forget to set healthy boundaries

Afraid of other's judgment, so we maintain our selflessness and feel guilty when we take care of ourselves

Afraid of the unknown because we want to be in control

Unfortunately, we're not always in control. We all resonate with becoming fearful, of staying in a rut and feeling stuck or feeling paralyzed with inaction. We all want to live our lives to the fullest and live happily ever after. We want to tackle our life's mission even if we have yet to discover it. We all have our deepest secrets that we're tempted to never disclose.

Fear is something we all resonate with. We all fear darkness, the unknown, and revealing our deepest, darkest secrets. We are paralyzed with inaction because we’re afraid of our next move. Is it the right one or are we digging ourselves deeper in our own hole of chaos and destruction? We want to get away from it all yet we keep still and remain frozen in fear, or we run the opposite way hoping our demons won't follow us. That debilitating emotion that we wish we didn't feel, yet we do, and we end up fighting it over and over again.

We must remember that without the darkness, there's no light. Fear isn't really a bad thing. It is has a purpose, and we all experience it for a very good reason.

• It allows for compassion, unconditional love and forgiveness of our very own mistakes or misgivings.

• It allows us to discover our lost selves, perhaps discover new talents and gifts and open ourselves up to a clearer path or life purpose.

• It allows us to discern who or what needs to go in our lives, in order for us to make room for the new.

• It teaches us to be mindful of our actions, thoughts, behavior and reactions.

• It teaches us to swallow our pride and put our egos in the back burner, to accept that we do make mistakes

• It pushes us to find courage and strength

• But more importantly, embracing our shadow helps us find our truth and lead us to personal empowerment.

• Accepting our darkness, our shadows and our fears will help us understand ourselves more, and will evidently lead us to the light.

What happens when we reject or suppress our darkness and our fears?

• We stay stuck and it eats us up.

• We hold grudges and point fingers

• We become resentful and play the victim role

• We re-live the past, and wonder why we're stuck

• We don't forgive ourselves for our mistakes, flaws, and guilty feelings.

• We question our worth, our skills and capabilities

• We put our walls up and close our hearts to others

• We feel the need to be in control yet we get depressed because we know we're not.

• We become co-dependent and stay in toxic relationships or situations

• We end up looking for external resources to save us from ourselves, and getting validation from others to appease how we feel.

• We miss out on wonderful opportunities and blessings

• We end up manifesting more negativities into our lives because that's what we are giving back to the Universe.

What we don't realize is that when we don't face our fears, when we keep it hidden and buried, it will resurface over and over again. That is the main reason it keeps us awake all night, feeling anxious and worried at all times.

Our shadow will eventually demand acknowledgment whether we see it coming or not. It will get its message across by repeating patterns and allowing us to make the same mistakes over and over again, until we get so sick and tired of our situation. We will be attracting the negative situations and toxic people around us, and our lives will be in constant chaos until we wake up and truly want for our lives to change. It's our soul sending that SOS message to us that it is time to look within, and face our shadows, our fears.

But how do we do it? How do we stop fearing fear?.

Digging deep and learning to acknowledge, understand, embrace and transmute that negative energies will give us the freedom to finally accept more light to enter our lives. We may not understand and get answers to some of our questions, especially if it involves other people who may or may not be in our lives anymore. However, the mere fact that we are willing to forgive and let go of the trauma and chaos in our lives, and forgiving our own mistakes, guilt and shame, we are healing ourselves. Our sincerest intentions are crucial to start the healing process.

Life coaches and mentors are amazing resources as they can help us with our shadow work. However, without the willingness to help ourselves, to do the "dirty or scary" work that we've been avoiding like a plague, we can't go very far, we cannot completely heal. When we rely on the external forces to help us move forward with our lives, we miss earning the wisdom that our soul is willing to impart.

It is hard work, and it takes time. And sometimes we have to repeat the process over and over again because we all are work in progresses. It's all part of our expansion. But having a better understanding of facing our fears makes us a little bit more daring and, hopefully willing to take the steps to go through the process of transmuting our negative energies into positive. We simply can't suppress our feelings and pretend they're not there, for it will let its presence be known eventually.

Our darkest side may be perceived as ugly at first, but let the ugliness transform us into something beautiful, a better version of ourselves. It is a vital part of us. We all have it, and we shouldn't be ashamed of it. Know that we all come from love and light, and the darkness inside us helps us to survive life's lessons in order for us to see and be that light.

It might be tough or even a continuous journey, but the light will always prevail once we learn to take courage and face our utmost fears and shadows.