Dear younger self,
As I turn 50 this year, and I try to embrace my new label as a "golden girl", I have been reflecting more about my quest for life's journey from the past, present and the future. The feelings of trusting my future and savoring my present are both strong, and yet I can't help but look back at the past with a smile on my face, and with wisdom to impart.
You probably are wondering how you turned out in the future, or how far you’ve come in life. Well, I’m here to tell you that you turned out alright. You had one hell of a life journey you could probably write a book about it.
Life will be good to you, then you’d feel as if the Universe has forgotten all about you, and then life will surprisingly be good again, and so on. The wheel of fortune is a continuous cycle that will make your life so interesting, and so alive. Friends who know your story will urge you to write a novel one day, and it will be up to you if you find the courage to share your story to the world.
Without ruining the mystery and giving out the specifics, all I could say is that your besties right now, will still be there for you in the future, even if you live in different parts of the world. You will be abundantly blessed with more lovers, friends and acquaintances that will come and go in your life, but they will all have a role to play. Lessons will be learned, and you will continue to evolve towards the next chapters of your life.
You must stay strong in your faith as you will be faced with hardcore challenges in life. Sleepless nights, wet pillows, anxious fingers, heart beating as if it will come out of your chest will all creep on you. You will feel insecure, lost and depressed over situations you have no control over. You will feel guilt and shame over sins and mistakes you have done. You will bravely face financial, medical and legal battles in life, but you will endure all these.
Your faith will be tested repeatedly, it will confuse the hell out of you. But fret not, my dear because you will survive all these. You will go within and master your own belief system. You will learn to love yourself unconditionally and you will end up awakening to your own spirituality, creating a personal relationship with your creator. All these lessons in life were meant for you to have as they will propel you to be a better version of yourself in the future.
So, my advice to you, embrace all the challenges in life. Play the card that is handed to you by the Universe, with the confidence that you are not alone in this life. You are loved and you are safe. You are always divinely guided, even if you don't always feel like it.
Believe in yourself for you have so much to offer. I know confidence is hard to master at age 18, but you must learn to love yourself for all that you are – with all your flaws and shortcomings in life.
You have no idea how strong, brave and wise you will become in the future. You will realize how resilient and creative you are as you manage to maneuver through the hardships in life. All these traits are within you, just waiting to be unleashed as you experience all the difficulties and challenges in life. Just know that you have it within you, so embrace all challenges as these are all meant to happen. It’s for your own soul’s growth.
On a lighter note, I must say that what you are doing to your body today, taking care of it through discipline and constant exercise will prove to be a part of your future lifestyle. Kudos to you! For now, I feel so good about myself, I feel like I have found the fountain of youth. Aging gracefully is not just genetically charged, one must work hard – preferably early on in life – and I must assert, you are on the right track, girl!
Also, learn how to go with the flow and stop being the perfectionist Virgo that you are. Life is not perfect; you will learn that in life once you have your little ones. I won’t say how many you’re having, ha! But the point is, you will learn to compromise your standards and realize that it’s okay when the house is not all pretty and sparkly clean because kids will be kids. You will learn to give up the fancy china that you use for special occasions and replace them with paper plates; and you will learn how to give up scented candles because your loved one is allergic to it. It’s okay.
There are so many lessons in life that I wanted to share with you, which mind you, some of which I’m still practicing and learning at this point. Loving yourself unconditionally is one thing you should work on early in life, as it changes your belief system and it redirects you towards loving others with kindness and compassion. Allowing yourself to cry and purge without feeling guilty is not a sign of weakness, while learning to forgive yourself for all the decisions or mistakes in life is also part of loving yourself unconditionally.
And pretty please, do not let anyone talk you out of your passion. I know your true love is painting, and you wanted to major in that field, but people will talk you out of it, claiming that painting is not a career but just a hobby. Put their words in one ear and let it flow and move out the next ear. You know what you want because your heart and your soul speak of it. You are not being disrespectful if you follow your own intuition and not what others deemed best for you. They may mean well, but your heart and soul won’t steer you wrong, so always follow your intuition and life’s flow will be easier as you will be in sync with your life’s path.
Lastly, I want to thank you for all that you are and for all that you have become. You have a long way to go, my dear. The roller coaster of life is waiting for you as you take your seat and buckle up. Just know that you are amazing, and you have so much ahead of you. Enjoy your existence, and your expansion with the notion that we are first spiritual beings having a human experience. So, keep your spirituality intact, and allow your faith to be your seatbelt, keeping you snug and safe in the roller coaster ride that we call life.
Love,
Your future self
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